How do you deal with stress?

I asked 10 women that question. Here’s what they said.

‘Stress’, of course, is a broad umbrella that can include everything from day-to-day upsets like traffic to managing a difficult, ongoing situation.

The responses seemed to fall into eight rough clusters, though some could span more than one.

Take a look and see if you find inspiration for managing your own stressful situations.

Spend time in nature (I’ve put gardening in here too)

Watch the sunrise from my place

Walk in the bush, in nature

A gentle slow walk, admiring people’s gardens, watching birds, the sea

Sitting by the water, just watching the waves/birds/dogs/people

I go outside…two minutes outside changes everything.

I find watering the garden or cutting some flowers or leaves from the garden and placing them in a vase very relaxing.

Move (especially in nature)

Starting the day with a long, brisk walk — maybe 30 or 45 minutes

Walking in nature

Yoga classes, or doing yoga in the open air

Going to the gym

Swimming

Connect with others

Talking to friends. It’s great to be able to pick up the phone and have a real conversation.

Time with a friend who ‘fills me up’ (and avoiding difficult, irritating, or self-focused people.

Get lots of hugs

Singing in a choir

Smiling at strangers; little conversations in passing

Be with my dog/s

Put things in perspective

Stepping back to re-evaluate and reprioritise

Work out what I can and can’t control. If I can’t control it, what can I do?

Noticing when I’m stressed and trying to get clear on what’s causing it – not always easy

I share my problems with my husband and he brings me back to reality, reminding me we are not living on the Gaza strip.

Remind myself that everyone has challenges, there are wars, famine…

Remind myself that I’m capable and will be able to work through my stress

Keep going — believe in resilience and a growth mindset, remind myself that things always change, accept death in all its forms.

If I’ve said or done the wrong thing, apologise to the affected person.

Plan and write lists (which might be related to putting things in perspective)

Make a plan and tick off each step to reinforce that it’ll be OK.

Plan ahead but pay attention to the present

Write lists: a to-do list for tomorrow at the end of each day so things are written down and I’m not carrying them

Saying no

Connect with a higher power

I pray and ask for strength when I am stressed over the health or well-being of our family.

Staying in touch with my spiritual life

Remembering that I am just walking through this world…

I go for a walk and practice gratitude for the blessed life I have.

Breathing and meditation

I take a few minutes to breathe: four breaths in, six breaths out.

Simply sitting and being — not doing

When I’m dealing with day-to-day stresses such as work or feeling overwhelmed by events I listen to a 10-minute meditation and try to reduce my heart rate.

I try to reduce reactivity… breathe low and deep, observe feelings and sensations rather than letting the mind go into overdrive.

Activities that absorb us/doing something pleasurable

Journaling

Reading

Sketching

Listening to music

Watching Netflix

Going to the football and barracking for my team — it’s an outlet.

Having something to look forward to, like a great holiday.

Singing in a choir could belong here too.

A few women pointed out that we need to build a healthy base to have the resilience to deal with stress. One list for this comprised yoga, exercise, healthy eating, meditation, joyful activities, community participation, and family connections. We’ll all have our own ideas of what we need for a strong foundation.

Another observation was that sometimes our first response to a stressful situation isn’t especially healthy — for example, we eat or drink too much, get angry with ourselves, or bottle things up then worry about them in the middle of the night.

And although a few women said they’d learned that wine is usually not helpful, one noted that ‘at the end of the week, if it has been a stressful one, I have a scotch and mineral water’.

Of course, there’s also tea. The same woman who likes a scotch is partial to ‘a cup of strong English breakfast tea with a dash of full cream milk always prepared in a teacup and saucer, with a side of vegemite on toast, but only before midday’. Indeed.

Photo Source: Kay Hannaford